One scene of whats you call a real life

Suddenly our new maid said she wanted to go back home in the Idul Adha time. Because it was so sudden I asked why, she said because her sister in Kalimantan wants her to join her. A simple reason to quit so early. I only paid her salary once.

It was Tuesday 9th of November when she asked me that she planned to leave on Sunday 14th. She asked me just in time when I was about to go to work in the morning. What a 'perfect' time, heh? Negotiation was happening, until we agreed that she can leave on Tuesday 16th. I can not force her to stay while she wanted to leave right? I also do not want to retain the person who doesnt want to work with us anymore. I understand that Fia so sad when she waved her goodbye at that night. Gosh...it took quite long time to let her go. She took her a photo. But, you've got to face it. I embraced her...

Fortunately, the next day was holiday. Happy Idul Adha everyone. Someone has brought us a plastic of daging kurban. Think..think..think what to do with that. Keep it safely in the fridge. At the same time, the big family from Depok and Condet came to visit us. God answered Yosua's prayer, that his cousins came to play with him. yesterday he told me that he wished his cousins would come to our house. Next day, voila...here they are. They were going to Kandank Jurang Doank, biking around the complex, playing the computer games and watching a film. Seemed that they had a lovely time together. Until he was too tired at that night. Well..so were all of us actually.

We all woke up when the kids' pick up car sounded a horn. Of course I can't tell her to wait. It would be a 30 minutes of waiting. Too long, I think. So, I prepared everything [breakfast, kids' meal, hot water to bath, uniforms to wear] and drove kids to school. The kids would have arrived on time at school if there has not been many traffics happened on the way to school. The traffics were s***s. As predicted, Fia and Yosua were reluctant to get off the car and enter their class. I cannot force them to do what they dont feel to, can I?

THIS IS WHAT YOU CALL THE REAL LIFE.

Having had such driving situation, now I had to drive back home. Well....I must admit that it was not their fault. But, can't they just go inside their classroom? This was only their first time they came late at this term, and I would take them to the teacher in charge and explain the situation. Nope, didn't work.

Arrived home, I just continued the household stuff at the back of the house. Cloths washing. While inside, Fia was sweeping the floor and washing the dishes in the kitchen. Both of us did it quietly, not even a word. Yosua was sleeping in his room. I felt a bit calm down to see what Fia's been doing. So I took the two ice cream from the fridge and offered her one. We enjoyed it in the living room while we watched the telly until Yosua woke up. The situation was melting. The ice cream really worked as an ice-breaker.

Facebook was one of the stress-release. One or two hours I was there, Yosua came in and asked me to go to my bedroom to find a letter for me.



So sweet. Fia even returned the money I gave her this morning. I smiled and called them to explain why I was disappointed this morning. Hope they listened and understood.

Well kids, being a mom is a grant, being a good mom is a never ending process. My whole life will always be full of learning on how to be one. Remember, even if I want to be a super duper mom, a mom is also a human who sometimes fed up with such situation. Having had that feeling, regrets always come at the end.

Having you two as my children is a priceless gift that God has given me in my life.
I love you kids...

A diary of three surviving days without Yuni Sara

Yuni Sara has gone home for Lebaran Holidays.
She went home joyfully on last Sunday and left me 'tearfully' imagining the days without her for about two weeks. Imagining that my lazy time will be very minimum because I'll be using that time by doing house cleaning, cooking, washing, mopping, etc etc.

She is a smart, energetic, diligent and helpful assistant in my house. She's been with us for three years already so she's about 18 years old by now. She coped most with everything in this household stuff.

She also borrowed books and teens magazines from my library. I recommended romance literature from Bahasa Indonesia section and Gadis magazines.

Kids like her very much. So do I. How can I manage this household business without her help while I work at the same time? Well, Yuni Sara also needs a break, right?
Having worked with us for the last one year especially at this Idul Fitri time, she deserves it. Enjoy your time in your kampung Yuni Sara....
[and please coming back...]

PS: I think I need to write it down in Bahasa Indonesia, just in case she came across and read it later? Just to make sure that she understands. :-)

Day one:
Woke up at 5am
ready to cook
upss...stove didnt work
no wonder
the gas run out
okey
lets start with drinking a glass of water
good for your health if you do it regularly every morning
but
not even a drip of water came out from dispenser tap
no wonder
the water galoon was empty
One hour later,
made a phone call for gas and galoons delivery
now I know the man who assisted Yuni Sara to do these kind of stuff
done
ready for work now

Day Two
Woke up at 5am
ready to cook vegetable soup and chicken stew
cut this, wash that, plunged the vegetables in to the pan, stirred here and there
and voilaaa....wups 7.30am
I supposed to leave for work by that time
I couldn't believe it..
I spent two hours and half
just to cook those two
I thought it supposed to take one and half hours at most
anyway...

felt touchy when I saw Yosua
so busy with his duty
washing all the plates and cups and cooking stuff
and refusing her sister's offer
to play outside for biking
'I'm busy', he was shouting back
so he knows he needed to complete his task
and he worked that out without having me telling him to do so
isn't that so sweet of him?
[it was him who chose to do dishes washing at the first stage]
wuppss...made my way to work, I knew it would be late though

Afternoon-back from work
I saw that clothelines full with the washed cloths
Just found out that Fia managed to wash them all during the day
Very well done, Fia

Day three:
I decided to wake up at 6am
Plan to cook one type of food only
Oriental Seafood Soup - that's what I call it-
A pan of boiled water
chopped garlic
shrimps, ikan kakap fillet and organic tofu
added a tablespoon of fish oil and salt sauce and pepper
Taste it..I think its oriental enough
that's for lunch
I'll balance the nutrition with more vegetables later

Well my third day without Yuni Sara is almost finish today
Realising that my house-duty was not that heavy as I imagined before
Kids are grown up, are they?
I think I now need to teach them about: consistency
So I can consistency have spare time in these times
to enjoy my Idul Fitri break too
well...I'm growing old, you know,
I think that is the fair reason to do that :-)

Lebaran

Sudah menjadi ritual tiap tahun, saat lebaran tiba, maka kesibukan yang berbeda bagi ibu-ibu rumah tangga yang bekerja seperti saya adalah menjadi ibu rumah tangga sesungguhnya. Sudah terbayang, ritual pekerjaan-pekerjaan rumah tangga yang akan menghiasi liburan lebaran SETIAP TAHUNnya. Bagun pagi,menyiapkan sarapan, memastikan anak-anak mandi, menyiapkan makan siang, mencuci perabotan masak maupun peralatan makan, mencuci baju, setrika baju, menyapu lantai, mengepel lantai, menyiram tanaman, memastikan kamar anak-anak tertata rapi dan benda-benda ada pada tempatnya dan .... mandi.

Sementara pada saat yang bersamaan, si mbak, yang biasanya menjadi asisten di rumah yang mengerjakan pekerjaan-pekerjaan di atas, sedang membuat ketupat, makan ketupat, bercengkrama dengan keluarga dan menikmati Hari Raya ini dengan keluarga besar, sanak famili serta kerabat dan teman, sambil tertawa riang, tanpa harus memikirkan apakah sudah beres memasak atau mencuci baju. Tentu saja mereka pantas untuk mendapatkan semua keriangan itu, setelah hampir setahun berpisah dari sanak keluarga dan terlebih setelah sebulan penuh menjalankan ibadah puasa. Perjalanan yang ditempuh dalam waktu belasan jam, dua kali lipat jarak tempuh dalam waktu normal, bukan menjadi penghalang untuk menikmati sukacita Idul Fitri di kampung halaman mereka. Perjalanan mudik dengan bermacet-macet dan menghabiskan waktu yang luar biasa mengundang keletihan badani, menjadi sebuah perayaan tersendiri yang mungkin telah dianggap menjadi ritual tahunan jelang Idul Fitri.

Ternyata...
Kembali ke rumah. Rasanya, baru membayangkan pekerjaan-pekerjaan rumah tangga tadi saja sudah melelahkan. Lebih baik berkutat dengan tumpukan buku-buku dan bekerja di depan laptop berjam-jam dari pada harus berkelahi dengan cipratan minyak panas dari ikan-ikan yang sudah tercemplung dalam wajan. Atau harus menggosok pantat panci yang-ternyata selama ini tidak dibersihkan benar- sudah mulai kehitam-hitaman. Lihatlah mesin cuci ini, lumut-lumut yang sudah mulai menduduki plastik penutup mesin pengeringnya, rasanya tidak bisa didiamkan merajalela. Itu perlu dibersihkan. Kemudian tumpukan baju-baju yang harus distrika. Hmm....dimulai dari mana ya? Kamar si mbak juga ternyata berdebu. Kamar mandi? sudah saatnya dibersihkan. Duh..betapa selama ini hal-hal yang kelihatannya sepele malah akan mencuri waktu lebih lama lagi dari sekadar menjalankan rutinitas pengaturan tata laksana rumah tangga sehari-hari.

Inilah daftar hal-hal yang perlu dibenahi:
- safety mat untuk lantai dekat cuci baju -- salah-salah, bisa terpeleset di lantai dekat air keran
- pisau -- satu pisau yang tajam tidak cukup untuk memotong buah, memotong daging, mengiris bawang. Dua pisau lainnya, tumpulll
- selang baru -- kasihan si mbak, ternyata selama ini harus mengambil air dari ember untuk dituang ke mesin cuci ketimbang menggunakan selang, mbok ngomong toh mbak--
- kain pel -- selama ini lantai bersih, di pel pakai apa ya?
- setrika baru -- nah..baru ketahuan setelah Fia menyetrika bajunya sendiri. Kalau strika itu sudah panas, harus dicabut kabel listriknya. Dan lihat kabel-kabelnya sudah menunjukkan badannya keluar.. wah...sungguh berbahaya. Ini list untuk setelah hari ketiga tanpa si mbak. Masih ada tujuh hari ke depannya.

Belajar dari ketidakhadiran si mbak
Saat menyiapkan makanan malam tadi, tiba-tiba Fia berkomentar, ternyata enak juga nga ada di mbak ya ma. Semuanya bisa kita buat sendiri. Mama nga usah kerja aja. Saya tidak berkomentar. Menyiapkan makan buat anggota keluarga memang mempunyai keunikan dan kepuasan tersendiri. Apalagi kalau nasi goreng buatan kita diancungi jempol dan mereka minta tambah lagi. Padahal, itu siasat makan malam, karena hari ini tidak ada pasar jadi tidak belanja dan stock di kulkas sudah habis. Untung masih ada buah apel untuk mengimbangi sayur yang tidak tersedia hari ini. Kemudian juga saat bersibuk-sibuk di dapur, mereka keluar masuk hanya sekadar menanyakan kita makan apa lagi ma? Senangnya, menikmati kesukaan mereka yang menunggu dengan penuh harap, menu apa yang akan keluar untuk makan siang atau makan malam mereka. Meski, ada satu malam, kami harus makan di luar karena rasanya sudah tidak mungkin lagi untuk masak makan malam, karena tubuh yang sudah terlalu letih.

Hal yang pasti, ternyata kami tidak harus mengambil semua pekerjaan itu sendiri. Anak-anak yang sudah semakin besar tampaknya juga sudah dapat 'diperbantukan' untuk membantu kami orang tuanya. Apalagi, inisiatif membantu keluar dari mulut mereka sendiri. MEski kadarnya tidak lebih dari kecerewetan ibu-ibu yang berkaitan dengan kerapihan rumah, tentunya. Ah...waktu berjalan begitu cepat. Setiap tahun, pasti ada yang berubah meski ritual pekerjaan rumah tangga tidak berubah. Kebersamaan tanpa si mbak ternyata punya nilai sendiri dalam kehidupan berumah tangga. Hubungan anggota keluarga semakin akrab satu sama lain, karena adanya beban sepenanggungan bersama. Kesempatan untuk berbicara dengan anak-anak dari hari ke hati juga dapat dilakukan kapan saja, bahkan saat sedang mencuci baju bersama. Kesempatan juga untuk menanamkan nilai-nilai kehidupan dan aturan-aturan yang berkaitan dengan tata cara dan etikat dalam kehidupan untuk anak-anak. Pola makan dan minum anak-anak juga terpantau dengan jelas. Apakah mereka minum susu dengan benar, berapa banyak porsi makan siang mereka, apa yang mereka lakukan di sekolah? semua terpantau baik secara kasat mata maupun dari perbincangan-perbincangan ringan sehari-hari. Saya yakin, pengalaman tanpa si mbak, pasti bervariasi dari satu rumah dengan rumah lainnya. Apalagi rumah yang biasa tanpa si mbak ya? Wah ..bersyukurlah mereka.

Demikianlah, ternyata quality time dengan anggota keluarga dapat terjalin dengan lebih sempurna, bukan saat berlibur bersama, tapi saat si mbak mudik. Meski tubuh letih, tapi banyak yang bisa didapat dari waktu-waktu bersama ini.

Mbak, kembali kapannn???